Chafing at the bit

So, getting closer all the time! 40 days!!! We still have not purchased our plane tickets, not until we have 100% of our monthly support raised and we are at about 65% and we really, really want to make it by March 13th! So we are pushing really hard. As of the middle of last week Beckie and I live together now. It is a good thing, we are going through the stuff we want to pack, sorting and making piles. Kind of like all of my life now, sorting and making piles- figuring out what is essential for life in Uganda, packing up other things to put in the attic to be stored here, boxing up stuff for my parents basement to come at a later date and trashing or giving away the rest. It seems like practically everything I do revolves around preparing to go or fundraising. I guess that is the way that it is supposed to be but I'm ready to be done with this part. Once again I'm chafing at the bit. I look back over the past 10 years (sorting through piles of old journals!) and it seems I've done that a lot. Over and over I tell the Lord I don't like it. I would rather be determining the speed and direction. I don't really want this bridle, the chafing. But then I look back and see this path. I'm reminded that God sees the big picture. And I want more than anything to be on the path that He wants me on. So I settle down again. I know that right now this is what I'm suppose to be doing and where I'm supposed to be doing it.