Much better

So week one done. I have enjoyed so much getting to know this group and learn from them. We are headed from here to Athens, Greece Quito, Ecuador Soroti , Uganda and a "restricted" country. I want to post so much more but too tired now.....

"missionary in training"

So I've managed to make it this far.... haven't flunked out yet :)

Actually, I'm having a lot of fun. The first two days this whole group of 50+ (see the very small picture to the right, trust me Beckie and I are in there) but we are a much smaller group now for the rest of the training. 9 currently and that number will fluctuate a little more as the short termers leave and a few others will join for language acquisition. We attend class all day- today was "Human Resources", session #1 of "Finance", "Information Systems" and sessions #1 & 2 of "Cross Cultural Communication". Tomorrow is more communication, "Team Dynamics", "World Wide Ministry of ITeams" and "medical insurance". (A whole hour for that last one- very exciting). But our evenings are free. We make and eat dinner together and generally just goof off. Life is good.

100% in 100 days

I'm trying to get into the habit of posting frequently again... feel like I have a lot to do to prepare for class Monday but this is as good a reason as any to procrastinate some more. My brain is a little fried but I'll try to make this coherent. Anyway....

Fundraising!
So I made it through our VERY intense fundraising seminar. Nearly 18 hours of lecture crammed into 2 days. But it was all good material. I feel like I finally know how to tackle this huge undertaking of $40,000 and $3,000 per month that has to be raised before we can get to Soroti.
I know God will provide. Beckie and I are trusting for 100% of our funds raised in 100 days. Watch out. I will be calling you up! I'm looking for "vicarious rope holders". Could that be you?

I was reminded again and again that I am not begging for money. I am offering people the opportunity to invest in the great comission and join God in the work that He is doing!
I'm trusting God to do really big things in the next 4 months. I have to admit I'm asking big thinks of Him but I'm also learning that He is honored by the magnitude of our requests. They acknowledge how amazing He really is. He told us (James 4:2) "You do not have because you do not ask."
We can't do what only God can do but He won't do what He's asked us to do!

New Chapter...

I have hung up the green scrubs, given away most of the potted plants and dropped the cats off to their new home. I'm living out of suitcases and the back of my car. Tomorrow Beckie and I head to Chicago to start training with IT. It feels like a whole new season, very exciting but just a little bittersweet.

Whoa...

Been a whirlwind last few days. I've been feeling so anxious and blaming in on a lack of running. But really it is so much more. Talked with someone I really looked up to and she reminded me that God gives us grace enough for one day at a time.
Just one.
One day.
Sufficient grace to cover it.
More than just enough.
So often I want more.
But now I'm just enjoying the grace for today. Still struggling with a little anxiety but the perspective check was good. I'll just keep calling out. I know He hears.

Suffering

This world is a messed up place. Just in case you hadn't noticed allow me to point it out to you. There are kids, innocent children starving, homeless, parent less. They have done nothing wrong. There are some who will never sleep in a clean bed with a mattress and sheets. There are some who will never know what it is like to be healthy. They are infected by HIV before they have ever made a single choice for themselves. Young girls raped. Young boys abducted. Scared. Hungry. Lonely. Hurting. Suffering.
Worse yet, it is not isolated to one small place on this planet. Or even confined to one large place. It is all over. Everywhere. There is abuse in my backyard. Hunger , pain and suffering on your street.

Yeah, but God exists and He loves us right? All of us? These kids too? He is fair, forgiving, and merciful, right? So how do these two things fit? I know that God is all wise, all knowing, all powerful. He can fix this mess we've made...right?

Then why doesn't He?

(Don't worry, not having a crisis of belief, just trying to understand...)

Second Annual Semi Silent Retreat

Second Annual Semi Silent Retreat

It is good to just shut up sometimes.

Facts vs the truth

So here is what I'm pondering tonight....

Far too often we assume that the facts of our situation are the truth.

Just think about it a second.

We assume that the facts of our situation are the truth.

Maybe the facts of your situation are that you are in financial trouble with few options. But is that the truth? No, the truth is that God promises to provide for our needs.
Maybe the facts are that no one understands and you feel so alone. But is that the truth? No, the truth is that Jesus walked this earth and He does understand and He does not leave us alone.
Maybe the facts are God is distant from you and you can't see Him. What is the Truth? He wants to know us intimately! He says He is standing at the door knocking!


THE FACTS DON'T HAVE TO BE THE TRUTH! The TRUTH is God's. The facts are never greater than God, God is the Truth. God is Truth.

The facts are I'm a screw up. The truth is I'm a child of God, a worthy creation, covered in grace!
The facts are we all deserve the consequences of our mistakes. The truth is God's mercy covers us!
The facts are this life seems purposeless, hopeless and mean. The truth is God gives joy, peace, hope and purpose! He is offering these gifts for the taking!

Do you believe the facts or the TRUTH? Do we live like we believe the truth?
Your facts will not set you free! The Truth sets you free!

Thats it. The rest is yours to ponder.

Just need a run...

It has been a while since I've needed this particular medium to unwind- though I feel like unwind is far to mild of a word. Ever since I've messed up this ankle I've felt so pent up... and it just keeps penting. I know, not really a word, bite me. See? There you go. Far to pent up. I need a release so badly. So here I am, just trying to unwind. Just like a good run to clear my mind and get ready to sleep. Lacing up the shoes now and headed out the door. My thoughts are so rapid, pretty much like my foot steps the first few minutes. Take off down the side of the road. Work tonight was crazy. I didn't get nearly enough done today before I went in. And all the stuff that I thought maybe I'd be able to do at work, what a joke, just too busy today. Should have known better, it's a Thursday. Wonder how that kid is doing? I really wish she would have stopped seizing. The ambulance couldn't have arrived sooner. I hate taking care of kids. But, wait isn't that what I'm signing up to do in Uganda? What have I gotten myself into?! I'm not cut out for this! O.K. Breathing is too hard, still warming up. Slow down a little, there you go, tuck into my stride. That feels better. Why do I always do that my first half mile? Deep breaths, keep slowing the breathing down. Unwinding. Tomorrow, have to pick up my computer. Longer strides, stretch it out. Still have 6 of those papers to write and submit. And those other ones to edit one more time. Got to get that computer on the internet right away to get those turned in. Finally sweating. Still holding a good stride. Also got to get that letter going for people on the support list. I really need to get that in the mail before I leave. Have to make that a priority. There is time left though, I can still get it all done. Turn left up here. Just before that street light that is always out, those kids are always just sitting there smoking and cursing. Don't need any trouble. Tomorrow I have to move all that donated stuff into storage too. Carmen is getting me so much stuff to bring. I wonder if I'm going to be able to get this stuff in country? I can't wait to give it to those who really need it though. It'll be so worth it. Starting the hill. I hate this climb. My quads, every time. Keep your head up. The top of the hill is just there. Little more... its a good burn. Should call Beckie tomorrow. Gotta get the oil changed in the car before we head to Chicago too. Wonder if one of the brothers has time. So, down the hill or straight? 25 minutes, guess thats about enough. Time to start to cool down and call it a night. Back toward the house I guess. Oh, the house. It needs so much work still. And tenants! I've got to get some people back into it. I just don't know who, just don't have enough time. But I don't have the money for it to sit empty either. Money! I've never spent so much time worrying about money before! I know God will provide. He called me to it, He will take care of it. Need only another $1,500 for training. But $40,000 after that. Not until later, there is still time. One step at a time. Back on my street. Slow to a walk. Sweaty. Good. Stretch for a minute. Feels so good. Nice to just sit here.... quiet.... both in my head and out. Much better. If only....

Be still

So... what is going on now? I've begun counting the days until Beckie and I leave for training. Less than a month now (27 days) . I'm struggling though what seems like a huge pile of books to read and papers to write. I'm trying to process what God is teaching. I'm working as many hours as I can pick up while spending extra time in devotion. It all seems just slightly overwhelming right now... The funny thing is that I think God is telling me to stop striving, be still. Psalm 46:10. Know that He is God. Know that I am loved. Not because of what I do, or what I accomplish. That I can never, never do enough or be enough to earn His love. And, most of the time, I'm not trying to earn it. I just whan to say thank you, that I appreciate His grace. But, even then I can't do enough. So, stop striving. Be still. *sigh* I'm working on it....

Dinner

Sorry- I wish this came through more clearly but it is an invitation. Feel free to join us for a Ugandan dinner and a movie. Friday Aug 21st, food 6 ish and movie 7 ish. Remembrance church, around the back, bring a lawn chair or a blanket and be ready for a cross cultural experience!

Beckie

So my friend Beckie is in Soroti, Uganda right now scoping things out for us. Will you be praying for her?

• That God gives her wide open eyes and a wide open heart.
  
• That she is able to listen to His leading.
• For the relationships she builds and interactions she has with people.

I'm so jealous!

International Teams- Sending 1200 workers in 210 teams to 66 countries in order to implement the transforming mission of Jesus

"MOBILIZING INTERNATIONAL TEAMS TO BUILD TRANSFORMING COMMUNITIES "

MOBILIZING

"Mobilization" is the process of stirring individuals in the body of Christ to move out of their current situation into innovative, cross-cultural ministry and to place them strategically in the ministry context.

We speak prophetically to the church today regarding its responsibility for global evangelization.

We are catalytic and innovative in our approach, with a concern for quality in the process.

We communicate with integrity, seeking to match expectations with reality and our mobilization is church-based, because we believe that God's desire is to work through His church to redeem the world.

INTERNATIONAL

The "international" aspect of this ministry permeates our organization. It speaks of who we are, what we do, and how we do it.

"International" means that we are cross-cultural and cross-geographic as we facilitate the sending and receiving of strategic workers throughout the body of Christ worldwide.

Our teams reflect the diversity of Christ's body in many ways, including cultural background, ethnicity, giftedness, and social status.

"International" also speaks to an incarnational approach that gives respect and dignity to those whom we serve.

TEAMS

Scripture offers us "teams" as a primary model of ministry. Working together in teams is important because God has not given all giftedness to any single individual.

We help to create partnerships and unity not only among individuals, but also with other churches and various ministry organizations.

We seek to mobilize teams which are well trained and which have an environment that is open and honest enough to accept and challenge one another.

TO BUILD

How we do what we do is critically important.

We desire to be spirit-led, following His guidance and trusting His power to be an agent of change in the world.

We seek to be intentional and strategic by articulating a clear and compelling vision and well-designed plans.

We "build" by a holistic proclamation of the good news through words and deeds.

Our approach is long-term and in-depth because we value persistent efforts and enduring results.

TRANSFORMING

Our mission is true disciple making. It is not enough to see people merely accept Christian beliefs.

One of the greatest evidences of real transformation is the reconciliation of opposing segments of society.

We believe that it is through prayer that we stay in tune with the Master's will and access His transforming power.

Our efforts are aimed at results that multiply and reproduce on their own - lives being transformed by God and transforming others.

COMMUNITIES

When speaking of "communities" we mean at least three levels where the transforming power of Christ brings change:

THE TEAM - Teams are a microcosm of the unity and diversity that make up loving Christian community.

THE LOCAL CHURCH - Transforming "communities" also includes the local church.

THE LOCAL COMMUNITY - The development of vital, indigenous, effective communities of faith will also transform the local community. Therefore, our aims include the resulting transformation of the surrounding society.

Maps

Sacrifice

One of my co-worker frequently makes me think... today it was about sacrifice. Some people that I talk to perceive that leaving for Africa will involve such large sacrifice. But I know better. I am learning that it is not a sacrifice to give up things I don't value. So if I adjust my values away from what the world says is important I don't have to give up anything! I know that when I make this step in faith, and every step after that as I follow the leading of my Lord I will receive infinitely more than I have given up. Our God is amazing like that.
But can I take it a step further? Am I so bold as to say I even want to suffer for my Savior? Do I really want an opportunity to show my love to him? His disciples rejoiced in their chance to sacrifice. (Acts 5:41...rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name.) I'm not sure I can honestly say that yet, maybe someday. For now I will just enjoy the privilege of being able to serve the Lord Jesus Christ how He asks as I prepare to go.

Rukiya

This is why I want to go so badly-
Rukiya is a new adition to the baby home in Soroti. She is three months old and 2.5kg (5.4lbs). Her mother died and was HIV positive and at birth she weighed 1.5 kg. A basket lady, Mary, her great grandmother was taking care of her but she is very sickly and malnourished. Rukiya is nothing but skin and bones really. She is drinking well and will be loved and cared for at Amecet but she just reminds me of the huge need. I can't help but wonder how I will even be able to help... then I remember I am just an empty vessel being used by the God of this universe who hates this suffering far more than I do.

Kid's Camp 2009

Three and a half weeks ago I didn't think I was doing camp. I had spent hours praying about it and was not getting an answer at all. I didn't understand why but I decieded that if I had not heard from God to go, well, I wasn't going to go. I figured it was better to buckle down and work all summer, get ready to go, etc... Well, some pieces fell into place that, even looking back on it I don't really understand, and I got a week off and got ready to go to camp. This is something that in years past I spend months getting prepared for and now one week before I'm getting a cabin assignment. What is God got in store?!