Discouragement

I don’t really know why but lately I find that I get discouraged so easily. Maybe discouraged is the wrong word, disheartened might be slightly more accurate. I’m not sure why and I don’t really know how to change it but this post isn’t exactly about that anyway.  I just noticed it again this evening and found myself wondering about more. But here is why I noticed….

Last week Monday school started back up again. (This is not the discouraging part. As a matter of fact remember that old Staples commercial where they are playing the song “It’s the most wonderful time of the year” while the dad of these two kids skips through the store and tosses school supplies in the cart? I completely resonate with that right now. The kids have been out of school since well before Christmas and it was so time for them to go back. But this isn’t the point of this post either. Good grief, focus Kragt!) Betty, one of our most regulars around here, was in Primary 5 last semester. Their new school year starts now, so she should have been moving up to P6 but she completely failed all of her final exams. (Beckie and I have some strong suspicions that she has some serious learning disabilities on top of the fact that she attends one of the worst schools in Soroti and she has been passed up a grade every year despite the fact that she is completely illiterate and her math skills are nearly nonexistent.) Not her fault at all that she failed. She seemed to be trying, but too many things were piled against her. So, she was told that this year she wouldn’t be promoted up a grade. I had decided that I was willing to pay the higher fees to get her into a better school before she missed the opportunity and would never learn to read. So, last week she started in a new school. She was excited and I was optimistic. At the time of "registration"  there was no room for her in P5, the class she was to repeat. Based on her test scores, it was determined that she would do P4. She is technically old enough to be in P7 (though that matters little here) but she is now doing primary 4. 

She came over this evening after school and I offered her milk and cookies. She sat down and told me that she had to work through both of her breaks because she works slowly so she didn’t get lunch today. Considering that she had inhaled the cookies and I’m not sure the milk even touched the cup between the carton and her mouth, I pulled some rice out of the fridge, which she willingly ate plain and cold then a banana. I asked her why she hadn’t gotten to eat. Her response was that they had to make a list of 20 words that started with W before they could go out of the classroom. In her past school, if the student doesn’t know an answer they get caned. She assured me a few days ago that they don’t beat students at this new school.  But this seems almost as bad. If a student doesn’t know the answers, struggling alone all through the lunch break is going to help!?! So I grabbed a pen and slid a paper over to Betty. I told her we would make the list now and she would bring it in tomorrow. She took a deep breath then asked me what she should write. Words that start with W, I said. Ummmm, she paused. Then she asked me how to spell shopkeeper. My turn to pause. Does that have a W? I asked.  Oh dear. She thought it did. So we made the w sound for a while and I gave her a few examples. With help she managed to write a few words but she was tired and having a hard time focusing. I let it drop and we went outside where she filled her jerry can of water, hefted it up on her head and started her walk home. She looked as dejected as I felt. She will probably "work" through lunch again tomorrow. 

Betty is the one in the white shirt. I'm sure she feels a bit like learning to read is as hard as pushing this rock off the side of the mountain. 

These pictures were taken a week or so ago when Beckie and I went for a hike with Betty and Abella one evening around sunset before they went back to school.