Tuesday, January 25, 2011

In over my head again...

                                      * 1/23  Posted late but this one needed some processing first…
I hate days like today...I feel completely overwhelmed by the needs and the suffering.  
This morning Andrea (long term team mate who is passionate about vulnerable kids) and I headed out to check on Lazaro. It was going to be just a quick check to see that he was still mostly healthy. Because I really didn’t have any other intentions for the visit I just brought Abella along to translate for me. She does really well considering she is only13 years old, translating is hard enough already and she is trying to translate me from English into Teso but Lazaro’s family speaks Kumam.  I usually bring a Kumam speaking adult but today wasn’t supposed to be complicated….
We arrived at Lazaro’s hut only to discover that today was clearly not a normal day for them. 
Decorated for the bride's family
Building a structure for shade
 There were about 4 times the number of people around, they were constructing a shade for a big group and the place was clean and decorated. It was Lazaro’s step sister’s introduction day. (Kind of like an engagement party for the two families to come together and fight over the bride price.) So everybody was busy but they set us in the shade and we waited for them to quickly bathe Lazaro and bring him out. While we sat, an elderly grandmother who I had helped get a walker for her grandson sat down next to me. She told me she was so happy to see me but she was worried about Albert, her grandson. She hadn't seen him in months as he was back with his mother. I know this mother to be very neglectful which is why he was with his elderly grandmother in the first place. It was too far to walk and would I be willing to drive her to check on him? I said I couldn't today but we could go Wednesday morning. She was very please and stayed sitting with us in the shade while we waited for Lazaro. It was becoming a long wait as another mother of one of the other kids I check on came up to me. (I think she had been helping to prepare food.) She said her son Job has been really sick and would I look at him too? I told her yes and she took off to go get him. Lazaro looked pretty good but he has a broken wrist. I guess he was being carried by a brother then wasn't any more. It is amazing that more things weren't broken when he fell. While I was trying to figure out if the wrist could be splinted Andrea shared a little with the women that were surrounding us. Then there was some singing and dancing- these ladies were ready to party! It was clear there was lots of preparation left for the introduction so we began moving back to the car. Job’s mother had not yet returned so we waited for a few minutes. Next thing I know there is a small crowd gathering around us (of clan members who are arriving for the party) and some one placed what felt like a newborn in my arms. Where did my translator go?! As I unwrapped a little I discovered it was a baby but only the weight of a newborn. Her little knees were contractured so tight against her belly and her heals tight against her buttocks.  I couldn't get any idea of what was going on as there were three people trying to tell me and my young translator was not getting any of it. Three months old maybe. But I couldn't understand if anyone knew what caused it or how long she had been like that.  As only can happen in the village the crowd was growing exponentially and I just can’t handle that. So I handed the baby back and promised to return.  I started to extract myself from the middle and another man grabbed my arm. “You come see my child.” At least we were functioning in English again… He had a kid with a heart condition (?!) that needed help. The child wasn't at this home, at another in the village so I agreed to see that one also when I return. Then I bolted for the car. When Abella had disappeared she had found a sibling of Job’s who was helping to build the shade and he guided us through the bush where Job’s mother was just getting home. (Good thing we didn't wait for her!)  Job has clearly lost a ton of weight. His little arms and legs were just bone. Abella really struggled to understand Job’s mother (also a Kumam speaker, not her native Teso) and help me understand. I think the long and short of it is his VP shunt is blocked. She took him to the neuro hospital in Mbale where he was tube fed for a two weeks but she had to bring him home. (no more money?)  He still wasn't eating but she said he would drink. While sitting there struggling with what to do, I developed a headache.  I could give them more money to go back to the hospital but for what? More weeks of tube feeding? If they didn't replace the shunt the first time I didn’t think sending them back would do anything.  So do I supply them with protein rich formula? But he seems like the best candidate for aspiration pneumonia I’d seen in months. Palliative care? Ideally I should lay it all out for his mom. Help her understand how he could choke, how there wasn't medicine that could help him be able to eat again, how there was so little we could do. But that conversation isn't easy when we share the same language and I’m not trying to pass it all through a child translator.  So I encouraged her to keep doing her best and I’d come back…
So tomorrow is the day I go back. I’ll attempt a splint for Lazaro, attempt to find Albert make sure he isn’t being neglected, attempt to explain some things to Job’s mother and help her decide what to do for her dying son, attempt to check on this little girl with a heart condition and attempt a diagnosis or at least a plan for the family of the little girl who can’t move her legs. I have a Kumam speaking adult translator lined up but he and I don’t work super well together because I feel like he doesn’t translate exactly what I’m saying, he makes promises for me that I can’t always keep and he tries to tell me what he thinks I want to hear. I am already afraid I’m going to come home with a headache….

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